The List and I love you.

     A few blogs ago I told you about a call I received from a lovely gentleman named Arash, who is a life coach with Bob Proctor. I am still working with the exercises he gave me. One of the things he said to do was to tell myself I love you, every day for 90 days. I have sat here for ten minutes trying to think of words that describe to you how incredibly foreign and strange the words I love you felt coming out of my mouth while I stood in my bathroom looking at me in the mirror. I love so many people. I offer my affection freely to those I love and for a few I offer my complete self as much as I am able. Me, I have been less that kind to me. I keep missing days, I keep avoiding mirrors. I am going to stop doing that today. The other thing that Arash had me do was make two lists 20 items long each. The first one is all the things about me that irritate or upset me about myself. Basically the hate list. The other is the Grateful for, Love List. The first list I am supposed to burn so I can be rid of it. The second one I am supposed to keep with me and look at daily. I am not going to publish the burn list, for obvious reasons, I am going to bring to you now the love list, and I am going to resist the urge to ask your opinion on it. Its not your list. Its mine so I need to be a honey badger about it. The funny thing about this process is that I absolutely expected to be finished with the hate list long before the love list, but I am not. I still need three more things. That makes me smile.
　
THE LIST
1. Nice
2. Funny
3. My way with words
4. Very Considerate
5. Smart
6. Open Minded
7. Loyal
8. Kind
9. Strong
10. Determination
11. That I like to sing
12. Good Dancer
13. Loving
14. Honest
15. My laugh
16. Nice Rack (I know I know but it really is)
17. Curious
18. My Journey
19 Caring
20. That I am trying.
　
Again I am having to resist the urge to write the words How do you like it reader… and all though I did just do that, the fact that I don’t actually mean the question does make it a bit easier to put it down and accept it for what it is. Just a learned behavior, looking to someone else to tell me how to feel about me. I have another blog coming I am working on it now, but I thought this should be by its self.
Cya Soon Reader, J