What you are the world is. And without your transformation, there can be no transformation of the world. ♥ J. Krishnamurti
ஜ۩۞۩ஜ
Hello Reader, had a pretty fantastic day today, and that is considering that I still don’t have a working computer, Thank God for a sweet friend or I would be writing long hand, and I wouldn’t be posting much for you. However, not having the distraction of my computer has left a bit more time for me to explore meditation so maybe the universe had something in mind, in addition to manifesting another computer. Hmmm. Well in any case. I have not had the same deep incredible experience like I did the first time I accidentally did it. I think I am just trying to hard to repeat that experience. I have done a bit of searching and I found a few good videos on youtube and am really utilizing them but I am going to start looking around for some DVDs and books. The main thing is that I am enjoying it and I am with each attempt at it getting deeper and more still. Also the more I do it the more I am interested in it and want to learn more about types of meditation as well as the history of it. Please leave me a comment if you have any advice or recommendations.
I also had a bit of a realization today (and you know I love those), when I am releasing I am usually very visual. I have many little images that come to mind when I am letting something go. A flower blooming, a hand, door, or window opening, the Red Man throwing thoughts out of my brain (I love that image) or one of my favorites which comes from something Hale Dwoskin says a lot in Sedonathru me but I am facing the flow and it is flowing out behind me. I realized today I had that backwards. I kept noticing this tension in my throat, not my neck, my throat like a choking feeling. I kept trying to meditate because I thought it was my chakras out of alignment, and that is probably true to a certain extent, but that wasn’t it, it was the flow. I was trying to keep the flow of goodness inside me instead of letting it flow thru me. When that thought hit me I had this vision, I saw energy as light flowing to me but from behind me actually propelling me forward as it flowed through me (pushed me). As it flowed it lit my entire being and then burst out of me in all these tiny brilliantly colored rays of light that then shone out and away from me and into the world and the universe permeating everything and everyone. Instantly my throat relaxed and I became the energy outlet that I needed to be.
If there is one thing that I would want you to take away from my blog about visualizations Reader, its this; They are fun, and they are powerful, but with out emotion and action backing them up they aren’t much more than nice little movies in your head. You will never get anything from them but frustration and confusion. You will never understand that you are in control of your life until you take control. Please always keep in mind that you are a conduit, not a receptacle, for the flow of energy in this universe, and if you remember that one important thing, you allow possibility into your life. I promise you it feels wonderful.
One last word before I go Reader, the people, things and energy that flow into your life will sometimes stay and sometimes they will only visit, but that is only you doing the job the universe needs you to do. Open to it. What you do for yourself you do for everyone.
Thanks for riding along,
Jammy
This is about you growing you. It is about you becoming more yourself. It is about you opening yourself up and receiving the Largess of the Kingdom… The Largess of the realm of ever expanding good otherwise know as Heaven… And having all of your needs met. ~ Micheal Beckwith
Showing posts with label people. Show all posts
Showing posts with label people. Show all posts
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
Back in Sedona using the Method.
Hello again Reader. Thanks for stopping by, I love it when you do. I spent my weekend with Hale from SM coming out of my speakers, in the form of cds five and six. I usually only listen to one before I post a blog but cd 5 was so similar to 4 that I flowed right into six, it just felt like they all fit together.
The work on both the cds really centers around four main points, recognizing them and letting them go. They are, wanting control, approval, security, and wanting to be one (or separate). At the core, the root of all that you desire in your life, you will find one of these four things. Like the work in cd 4 you also examine these core issues from both sides. So if you are working on control then you are dealing with the desire to control and be controlled. When we were releasing on control it was kind of hard for me to admit to myself that what I really wanted the most was to be controlled, taken care of, but once I did the need for it seemed to almost float away from me. Since then a few moments have manifested where I guess I needed to test myself? I don’t know but I left my lights on in my car and it wouldn’t start. Something like that would have in the past brought on a panic attack or at least anxiety. I got irritated but I just opened inside (like Hale says) and I remember thinking the next person I see will help me. Sure enough, he did. Ten minutes later I was on my way home. Smiling. I also have a broken computer. That would have normally had me freaking out, instead I just put my intentions out for a way to solve it and borrowed my friends computer in the mean time. Its true that your feelings affect how you react and how you function. I am functioning better everyday.
While I was listening to Hale talk about control, all of a sudden I could see all of us, humans, and we were floating on the earth like it’s a bubble. Some of us were just flowing with the currents in the surface of the bubble but some of us were just stuck in one place thrashing and fighting trying so hard to control the flow of the whole bubble. So busy thinking that their fruitless efforts mattered or made a difference, that they couldn’t even see they are the ones ruining the bubble for everyone. I felt a little silly to realize how much I am one of the ones thrashing around.
The two wants I am struggling with the most in my life are approval and security. Even just writing that, gave me a tight feeling in my throat which means I have more releasing to do. I have done a lot of creating situations where I am either not feeling secure or I am being disapproved of. I think recognition on this one is half the battle for me, because even though my throat is a bit tight right now, it doesn’t compare to how strongly I have felt those wants before. Every time I ever thought about why I wanted a lot of money it was “so I never have to worry again.” I do seemed to have attracted to me the opposite of what I want so that the cd also focuses on wanting both sides is crucial for me here. I am glad to be conscious of the ways that I am creating this scenario so I am able to change it.
Approval I am searching for, everywhere. It is getting easier everyday though to recognize that and release it. Some of the places that it is easy to get caught up in that are, Twitter, why did they stop following me? Or My Blog, Why did I not get more hits or comments? But just like struggling for security or control, by approving, or accepting myself I create the space where I am approved. The opposite of that though is what I have manifested most in the past, I can see now by stepping back a bit how I while wanting approval did the things that brought disapproval instead so it is important for me to release on both sides of that issue just like the others.
Today I was talking to a friend about twitter and how some people just talk on twitter and some just advertise, and that I like to follow the ones who talk because the ones who just advertise have a manipulative energy. The second I said that I felt the energy in me shift. I felt my motivations shift. I felt a new level of tension leave my body. I started to become aware of many of the ways that I am manipulative. I am thankful for this opportunity to grow, its easy for my brain to try and slip back into old habits but becoming aware of it has made it easy for me to stop it when it starts to happen.
Reader, if you find yourself similarly stuck in an old way of thinking remember that you can easily release that by opening inside and examining the feeling and letting it go. Keep in mind emotions are not you and as a separate thing from you can be dismissed if you so desire. If you are interested in this method you can get more information here, Sedona Method and as always Reader,
Thanks for riding along
Jammy
The work on both the cds really centers around four main points, recognizing them and letting them go. They are, wanting control, approval, security, and wanting to be one (or separate). At the core, the root of all that you desire in your life, you will find one of these four things. Like the work in cd 4 you also examine these core issues from both sides. So if you are working on control then you are dealing with the desire to control and be controlled. When we were releasing on control it was kind of hard for me to admit to myself that what I really wanted the most was to be controlled, taken care of, but once I did the need for it seemed to almost float away from me. Since then a few moments have manifested where I guess I needed to test myself? I don’t know but I left my lights on in my car and it wouldn’t start. Something like that would have in the past brought on a panic attack or at least anxiety. I got irritated but I just opened inside (like Hale says) and I remember thinking the next person I see will help me. Sure enough, he did. Ten minutes later I was on my way home. Smiling. I also have a broken computer. That would have normally had me freaking out, instead I just put my intentions out for a way to solve it and borrowed my friends computer in the mean time. Its true that your feelings affect how you react and how you function. I am functioning better everyday.
While I was listening to Hale talk about control, all of a sudden I could see all of us, humans, and we were floating on the earth like it’s a bubble. Some of us were just flowing with the currents in the surface of the bubble but some of us were just stuck in one place thrashing and fighting trying so hard to control the flow of the whole bubble. So busy thinking that their fruitless efforts mattered or made a difference, that they couldn’t even see they are the ones ruining the bubble for everyone. I felt a little silly to realize how much I am one of the ones thrashing around.
The two wants I am struggling with the most in my life are approval and security. Even just writing that, gave me a tight feeling in my throat which means I have more releasing to do. I have done a lot of creating situations where I am either not feeling secure or I am being disapproved of. I think recognition on this one is half the battle for me, because even though my throat is a bit tight right now, it doesn’t compare to how strongly I have felt those wants before. Every time I ever thought about why I wanted a lot of money it was “so I never have to worry again.” I do seemed to have attracted to me the opposite of what I want so that the cd also focuses on wanting both sides is crucial for me here. I am glad to be conscious of the ways that I am creating this scenario so I am able to change it.
Approval I am searching for, everywhere. It is getting easier everyday though to recognize that and release it. Some of the places that it is easy to get caught up in that are, Twitter, why did they stop following me? Or My Blog, Why did I not get more hits or comments? But just like struggling for security or control, by approving, or accepting myself I create the space where I am approved. The opposite of that though is what I have manifested most in the past, I can see now by stepping back a bit how I while wanting approval did the things that brought disapproval instead so it is important for me to release on both sides of that issue just like the others.
Today I was talking to a friend about twitter and how some people just talk on twitter and some just advertise, and that I like to follow the ones who talk because the ones who just advertise have a manipulative energy. The second I said that I felt the energy in me shift. I felt my motivations shift. I felt a new level of tension leave my body. I started to become aware of many of the ways that I am manipulative. I am thankful for this opportunity to grow, its easy for my brain to try and slip back into old habits but becoming aware of it has made it easy for me to stop it when it starts to happen.
Reader, if you find yourself similarly stuck in an old way of thinking remember that you can easily release that by opening inside and examining the feeling and letting it go. Keep in mind emotions are not you and as a separate thing from you can be dismissed if you so desire. If you are interested in this method you can get more information here, Sedona Method and as always Reader,
Thanks for riding along
Jammy
Saturday, June 4, 2011
I was nice to me today.
I keep surprising myself this week, by the way I keep smiling for no reason, and by the things I am saying to myself, and not like you might think. I know if you have paid even the tiniest bit of attention to what I write here you know that my normal tone of voice with myself is less than… kind. This week though I have really noticed the tendency to do that fading and a new habit emerging. Earlier this week I recall I started to really slide back a bit in my thinking and I started to berate myself for it just a bit, my normal reaction. Then I all of a sudden I thought to myself, well that’s interesting and I just let it go. I sort of mentally patted myself on the head and said “Getting better at that aren’t ya girly.” I actually broke into laughter at the thought of speaking to myself that way. It was at once odd and familiar. Today I was making myself a salad and I was reflecting on my usual ways of thinking and how they are fading in me and I had a flash of panic like my brain was giving one last fighting try to get back to what it knows best, and I thought “That’s the old way baby doll.” Wait… what? Baby doll? Okay first I never call myself anything but my name or well unkind words like bitch. So the fact that I just used a term of endearment with myself, not to mention such an odd one, totally floored me. So much so that I burst out laughing at myself. I shook my head and finished making my lunch, but I am sure you can see what I mean here. These are things that wouldn’t have occurred in my life ever before I started this journey are becoming habits to me now. After the nearly year and a half of staggering depression I am finally coming out of (and I hope with these new tools am getting closer to being done with for good) these thoughts are the most breath taking glimpses of what is only just now being uncovered in me. I know I am beginning my life in a way that I had never anticipated could be possible.
Today on Twitter a new follower of mine referred to what I am doing as work… Work! I was moved to tears that what I am doing was recognized as my work. I know I haven’t made a shit ton of money at it yet but it’s the most important thing I have ever done in my life. It is my work. I am so grateful to be doing it. I will admit that I haven’t been the most ambitious person in my work, or any other area of my life for that matter. I have worked hard no doubt but I was always complacent to do just what I needed to do to survive. No more. I didn’t aspire to anything, and if I dared to even look up from my place I chastised myself back down, out of fear mostly I think, you cant make a mistake if you don’t try now can you. Since I have begun to release I have started to understand that my work isn’t just what I get paid for. Its so much more and what I am doing here, this work this self discovery, this blog, the book I will make out of it. It feels more real to me than any burger I ever served or register I rang or phone I answered or customer I served. Maybe I will make a million dollars and maybe I will make a million people point and laugh, I don’t know, but I do know that it wont matter. I will make the most of what ever happens, and keep smiling for absolutely no reason.
Thanks for riding along,
Jammy
Today on Twitter a new follower of mine referred to what I am doing as work… Work! I was moved to tears that what I am doing was recognized as my work. I know I haven’t made a shit ton of money at it yet but it’s the most important thing I have ever done in my life. It is my work. I am so grateful to be doing it. I will admit that I haven’t been the most ambitious person in my work, or any other area of my life for that matter. I have worked hard no doubt but I was always complacent to do just what I needed to do to survive. No more. I didn’t aspire to anything, and if I dared to even look up from my place I chastised myself back down, out of fear mostly I think, you cant make a mistake if you don’t try now can you. Since I have begun to release I have started to understand that my work isn’t just what I get paid for. Its so much more and what I am doing here, this work this self discovery, this blog, the book I will make out of it. It feels more real to me than any burger I ever served or register I rang or phone I answered or customer I served. Maybe I will make a million dollars and maybe I will make a million people point and laugh, I don’t know, but I do know that it wont matter. I will make the most of what ever happens, and keep smiling for absolutely no reason.
Thanks for riding along,
Jammy
Sunday, March 13, 2011
The Secret continues to change my life today!
I hope you have gone and found the secret for yourself by now if not, let me tell you it’s the law of attraction. You attract to you what you have in your life. I am still learning so find the movie or the book and let better teachers than I explain this too you. =D
Everyday I catch on a bit more to how the secret works and how I am using it whether I realize it or not in my life. Like this morning, I don’t know if you do this or not but I run little “plays” in my head about conversations I want to have with people. I think most women do this I know I do. But this morning as I was doing that unconsciously I realized the whole conversation was negative and that I was infact the one being negative, and what a realization that was. I immediately flipped the conversation in my mind to supporting and loving the other person and instantly my FEELINGS about that person changed. I saw them with love and understanding. I spent several moments thinking about why I loved them, why they were important in my life. I am so grateful for the knowledge that I was given today the insight into myself that I glimpsed that now I can used to live my life better and have stronger relationships with all the people in my life. I am so blessed to have this information in my life at this time. I am grateful for it.
As I read this I realize that I have made it seem like this change is effortless on my part, and I want to tell you its been a bit easier than you might expect, but it is an ongoing process for me. I don’t immediately think positive every moment of the day now or anything. But what I do is to consciously make an effort to flip the thought, flip that feeling and turn it to gratitude. For example just a few minutes ago. I was sitting here at this desk writing this very blog, as I was trying to concentrate on writing and The Secret some of my neighbors started to make a lot of noise outside. I started to concentrated on how much I appreciate the peace and quiet I live with in my life I did this for a few minutes let the feeling of that come over me I enjoyed that good feeling. I opened my eyes and began writing again ignoring the noise and enjoying my sense of well being. After a few minutes they finished the conversation and went in the apartment. I have to tell you that usually they sit outside for hours being loud and obnoxious, and maybe they will start again but I wont waste my energy being mad about it. Today is a nice quiet relaxing Sunday that I am enjoying I deserve it, I am grateful for it.
I can literally feel myself getting healthy! I can feel myself getting Happier every day! This is the blessing I was looking for in my life I called it to me. Over the last few weeks I have been asking to be shown a way to change my life. To be a better person. I have been asking God, “Aren’t I supposed to get better? Aren’t I supposed to figure out how to be a better person?” I mean seriously asking, which is funny that I was using The Secret, to ask for The Secret the whole time and I just didn’t know it. That is so funny to me. So ironically magical. I was asking for an answer and the answer was shown to me. Yes I am supposed to get better. Yes I am supposed to figure shit out! I have now been shown the way that I am going to do that. The way that I am already changing my life. The way I am already a better person. Everyday, hell sometimes every minute I find a new way to enrich my experience to be more filled with love and gratitude. I keep finding new ways to enjoy who I am and what this life has in store for me as I let The Secret guide my life, guide my emotions and thoughts.
I had a couple of things happen today that prove yet again to me how the secret works in my life everyday. First with my friend Craig. Like I said earlier I have this way of running shit thru my head over and over and I started to do that with Craig today. Deciding in advance how it was gonna go but in a negative way. I realized what I was doing and instead I pictured us laughing. I then thanked God for all the things about Craig that were wonderful and when he got here those are the only things that I noticed about him. The same thing happened with my Mom today too. It was the best days I had enjoyed with either of them in a while! And the only thing that changed was my attitude.
The other thing that happened today for me was when I went into the collective I am a member of (if you have read my blog you know I am a patient) and shortly after I got there a man came in after me and we were talking about a strain I had chosen and he liked as well but he said that he was only getting a couple of g’s I said not to worry the universe would provide more when he needed it. He said he hoped it would and I assured him it was so. I know it is after all so I had no issue conveying this to him. Then he mentioned to me that he has cancer in his eye, as he motioned to his right eye. I stopped him and I said Please don’t tell me about your cancer. Tell me about how you are healing. Everyone in the shop stopped what they were doing and told the stunned man.. She’s right! Lets hear about your healing you have to be positive! I then told him I wanted to tell him about something that changed my life. I told him The Secret website and told him to get the book or watch the movie, and that it had changed my life, another man chimed in that the secret was indeed wonderful and that he too had been changed by it. This is the chain that I am starting with the secret. I have no idea where the message will flow from me to him to…. Everywhere. My purpose is clear to me now. I am supposed to spread this message and to help people everywhere I am able to, in every way that I can. My job is to fill myself with joy till I am so over flowing with it that everyone around me is infected by it. To let my mission in life affect as many people as I can! I hope this blog is one way that I am able to do that! Thanks for reading and sharing this message with me. J
Everyday I catch on a bit more to how the secret works and how I am using it whether I realize it or not in my life. Like this morning, I don’t know if you do this or not but I run little “plays” in my head about conversations I want to have with people. I think most women do this I know I do. But this morning as I was doing that unconsciously I realized the whole conversation was negative and that I was infact the one being negative, and what a realization that was. I immediately flipped the conversation in my mind to supporting and loving the other person and instantly my FEELINGS about that person changed. I saw them with love and understanding. I spent several moments thinking about why I loved them, why they were important in my life. I am so grateful for the knowledge that I was given today the insight into myself that I glimpsed that now I can used to live my life better and have stronger relationships with all the people in my life. I am so blessed to have this information in my life at this time. I am grateful for it.
As I read this I realize that I have made it seem like this change is effortless on my part, and I want to tell you its been a bit easier than you might expect, but it is an ongoing process for me. I don’t immediately think positive every moment of the day now or anything. But what I do is to consciously make an effort to flip the thought, flip that feeling and turn it to gratitude. For example just a few minutes ago. I was sitting here at this desk writing this very blog, as I was trying to concentrate on writing and The Secret some of my neighbors started to make a lot of noise outside. I started to concentrated on how much I appreciate the peace and quiet I live with in my life I did this for a few minutes let the feeling of that come over me I enjoyed that good feeling. I opened my eyes and began writing again ignoring the noise and enjoying my sense of well being. After a few minutes they finished the conversation and went in the apartment. I have to tell you that usually they sit outside for hours being loud and obnoxious, and maybe they will start again but I wont waste my energy being mad about it. Today is a nice quiet relaxing Sunday that I am enjoying I deserve it, I am grateful for it.
I can literally feel myself getting healthy! I can feel myself getting Happier every day! This is the blessing I was looking for in my life I called it to me. Over the last few weeks I have been asking to be shown a way to change my life. To be a better person. I have been asking God, “Aren’t I supposed to get better? Aren’t I supposed to figure out how to be a better person?” I mean seriously asking, which is funny that I was using The Secret, to ask for The Secret the whole time and I just didn’t know it. That is so funny to me. So ironically magical. I was asking for an answer and the answer was shown to me. Yes I am supposed to get better. Yes I am supposed to figure shit out! I have now been shown the way that I am going to do that. The way that I am already changing my life. The way I am already a better person. Everyday, hell sometimes every minute I find a new way to enrich my experience to be more filled with love and gratitude. I keep finding new ways to enjoy who I am and what this life has in store for me as I let The Secret guide my life, guide my emotions and thoughts.
I had a couple of things happen today that prove yet again to me how the secret works in my life everyday. First with my friend Craig. Like I said earlier I have this way of running shit thru my head over and over and I started to do that with Craig today. Deciding in advance how it was gonna go but in a negative way. I realized what I was doing and instead I pictured us laughing. I then thanked God for all the things about Craig that were wonderful and when he got here those are the only things that I noticed about him. The same thing happened with my Mom today too. It was the best days I had enjoyed with either of them in a while! And the only thing that changed was my attitude.
The other thing that happened today for me was when I went into the collective I am a member of (if you have read my blog you know I am a patient) and shortly after I got there a man came in after me and we were talking about a strain I had chosen and he liked as well but he said that he was only getting a couple of g’s I said not to worry the universe would provide more when he needed it. He said he hoped it would and I assured him it was so. I know it is after all so I had no issue conveying this to him. Then he mentioned to me that he has cancer in his eye, as he motioned to his right eye. I stopped him and I said Please don’t tell me about your cancer. Tell me about how you are healing. Everyone in the shop stopped what they were doing and told the stunned man.. She’s right! Lets hear about your healing you have to be positive! I then told him I wanted to tell him about something that changed my life. I told him The Secret website and told him to get the book or watch the movie, and that it had changed my life, another man chimed in that the secret was indeed wonderful and that he too had been changed by it. This is the chain that I am starting with the secret. I have no idea where the message will flow from me to him to…. Everywhere. My purpose is clear to me now. I am supposed to spread this message and to help people everywhere I am able to, in every way that I can. My job is to fill myself with joy till I am so over flowing with it that everyone around me is infected by it. To let my mission in life affect as many people as I can! I hope this blog is one way that I am able to do that! Thanks for reading and sharing this message with me. J
Thursday, January 20, 2011
LOL Friendship
I talked to someone recently that I used to consider a friend of mine, a dear friend in fact. After chatting for a bit and getting caught up with what was going on with him and his hubby (who I used to consider my best friend) I was asked what was up with me, and I told him about what had been going on with me including that I had been diagnosed as a bi polar with a panic/anxiety disorder a couple of years back. And then he said something that will baffle me till the day I die. He told me, “Well we all did know something was going on with you but we didn’t know what.” Wow, Really? I haven’t been able to stop thinking about that. Because that basically means that people who Said that they loved me and cared for me could see that I was having a nervous breakdown (which I was btw) among other issues chose to just walk away from me rather than help me. Wow, Really? How is it possible that anyone could profess to love someone and see them so clearly in trouble and not help them. I don’t understand that type of thinking. I can understand if they had tried to help me and I wouldn’t take it. But there was no offer of assistance from them or any encouragement or moral support. None! Its stupid of me really to be surprised that people would act in such a callous cold hearted manner. It is in fact what we do, isn’t it? Anyway I guess what I got from the experience after reflection is the omission from my life of a couple of people who were never really my friends anyway. Pretty good deal I guess even though the price at the time seemed a bit high.
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